Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
首先，比《红色通缉令》高出几个《神秘海域》。 很完整，如果说当年的《危情谍战》是小妞片与特工片之间的错置，那么本片则是披着冒险外皮的纯正小妞电影，丛林和当年的都市没啥区别，桑德拉布洛克和钱宁塔图姆之间的关系演进也相当正统。至于性别？就和片中那几个manipulate的玩笑一样，只是笑料罢了
从剧情上来说，本片也是属于绝对够扯淡，洛雷塔被莫名其妙的绑架（谁会绑架一个娱乐书籍作家去解读古代文字，就算其先生以前是考古学家），而洛雷塔每部小说的封面男主，艾伦竟然去英雄救美，后面一系列的事情，只能说是毫无逻辑，毫无根据，随便鬼扯了……
双美丛林大冒险，钱老板看皮特的仰慕眼神太可爱了。基本上就是Romancing the Stone的重制，13分左右的画面里甚至致敬了一下。
就算她写个小说估计也没人看。
本质浪漫喜剧，传统冒险叙事中男女主角分工的调换也很有趣，至少作为一部喜剧让我结结实实笑了很久。另外被钱老板和皮特抬走还可以很潇洒地不回头看爆炸也太好笑了。
"I am a woman, I can't mansplain anything" "I'm a feminist, and I believe a woman can do anything a man can do" 全片笑点都在这一句了，我手上的排骨都被笑飞了
剧本像是根据明星的任务逆向工程出来的。布洛克在本片的表现（出棺材之前）是心情的真实体现吧。
基本就是把romancing the stone照搬了一遍，还没80年代的好玩。但我是sandy脑残粉
剧本太糟糕了，莫名其妙毫无逻辑的鬼扯，桑姐自带喜剧特效都救不回来。皮特的两分钟太帅了，全片唯一亮点。
好一般的电影，粗制滥造像去年的《丛林奇航》。以为是冒险解谜类，结果只有冒险没有解谜。
玩尬玩到顶点的一种喜剧，拿各方面反类型的僵硬来制造笑点，不过有些地方最终呈现出来的诡异感有点过头了，好在演员的发挥很出色，傻不拉几的钱老板，心不在焉的布洛克，还有来客串的皮特都可以说是满状态，是部冲演员表现去看的话绝不会失望的片子，打发时间还是很不错的。
这个女主演过不少喜剧，讲真的真不喜欢这个婊砸
就搞笑了十几二十分钟…然后就是无聊无聊无聊
桑婆还是厉害，不管什么年代演这类型电影都自带好笑滤镜。
6分。完全不知道在看啥。。。。整个故事除了皮特客串的部分就没精彩的地方了。。。看起来像是个探险片，但探险的内容其实并不多，基本就是男女主之间不断地碎碎念。。。完全不知道在说点啥。。。
挺一般的 及格线徘徊 但是有些地方挺好笑的
👍👍👍👍哎呀喂不愧是周星驰的接班人学王晶王家卫的风格真棒啊？？？？？？？？？😂😂😂😂😂
Jack Trainer领盒饭的方式简直和《阅后即焚》、《黑金杀机》如出一辙啊，论配角惊艳的吸睛技巧…
桑婆从最拿手的爱情喜剧换到了寻宝路线上就不太灵了，各种俗套和尴尬，最擅长的喜剧元素也消失了大半，论场面和故事呢似乎还不如<神秘海域>，真的就浪费了一个全明星阵容
[视]派拉蒙流媒体。三肤色开场，老子，道德经，饥饿游戏，飓风营救。亮片紧身衣，光头光腚舞者，动作戏少，解谜戏少，片名<迷失Z城>，情感升华戏频繁，皮特客串，结尾有彩蛋。小岛火山，葱郁盎然，丛林摩托，瀑布攀岩，成本有限，特效还行
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